Sixth Street’s Lindsay Farnsworth on Turning Uncertainty into Opportunity

Lindsay

Hello friends. Can I be honest with you?

We're going to do a little bit of American vulnerability right now.

Preparing to speak with you today really got me in my head. I had thoughts like, will I have the right words to share. I'm not an investor.

Are the half of the people in this room who are, going to relate to what I have to say?

How do I connect with this incredibly talented group of Sixth Streeters? I even had a dream in recent weeks that I was completely unprepared to speak to you today, and I actually had to leave dinner the night before to go back to my hotel room and write what I was going to say.

Everyone else got to stay at the dinner and enjoy the barbecue. Talk about a nightmare.

Moments of insecurity like this can be exhausting because of the mental gymnastics happening in our minds.

Focusing inward can keep us stuck in a loop of questions.

Am I good enough? Am I doing enough? What if I'm replaceable?

Allowing thoughts like this to spiral over and over can actually create a self-fulfilling cycle, because the time when you're in your head actually keeps you from moving forward and being productive, adding value.

Around here we have a Sixth Street-ism: are you over yourself?

And most often we think about that as operating with no humilities, coming with a no egos approach. And that is true.

But what if being over yourself, is getting over your insecurity?

All of us at times can get trapped in our own heads and it can lead to a mental spiral.

When the focus is squarely on me like it is right now, it's like staring into a mirror that magnifies our uncertainties.

So, rather than lay awake and worry that I was going to miss out on barbecue, I had an aha moment.

Changing my perspective on this talk. From what am I going to say to what can I share that might actually benefit you?

It turned that mirror of uncertainty into a window of opportunity.

I started to think about how sharing my experiences and learnings, even my frailties, might just help someone.

Maybe there's insights that I can share that give you a tip or trick that will help you in your own moments of insecurity. Maybe you just need to know that you're not alone.

Even senior leaders can get stuck in their head at times, but perhaps I can share a strategy with you that will help you unlock something bigger than yourself.

There's a common fear in a high-performance culture that if you train someone too well, you'll make yourself replaceable. And I have certainly experienced those moments.

As someone who has had three parental leaves with the firm, I face this uncertainty every time I came back from leave. There's a bit of a question of what role am I going to play now?

Those responsibilities that I used to hold before I went out, other people are doing them now, how do I slot back in? And what if they're actually doing those jobs better than me?

Upon one of my leaves when I returned, I thought that I would just pick up my old responsibilities supporting our capital formation and strategy team on anything tax related to our fundraisers.

I liked being the go-to for tax answers. I liked getting on calls with our LPs.

We were working on a special structure from one of our largest investors. They wanted to co-invest alongside SSLP in direct lending deals.

And we were looking at implementing a process similar to what we had done in our growth funds, but we were encountering meaningful resistance from our capital partners on some of the terms we were proposing.

Sam Van Pepper Strait from our tax team had gotten involved. He was helping drive and lead discussions and questions with our firm leaders, our council, even our capital partners.

I found that he was commercial and thoughtful and he was looking around corners even thinking about how is this new fund going to interact with our other funds who invest in the same portfolio deal?

And it was in that moment. In fact, at an offsite a few years ago, we were in a conference room and I realized Sam is thoughtful and capable, and he's fully capable of running those interactions without me taking the reins back.

I would still be here to support him and he can always call. But allowing him to continue to flourish was important.

So, what I came to realize from this experience: stop worrying about being replaceable.

You actually become irreplaceable when you demonstrate that you have the skills to build the team that can replace you.

And that's part of what leadership growth is. Multiplying your impact. Investing in the next gen makes you realize that you have so much to give, and that realization is the fastest way to quiet imposter syndrome.

You stop wondering if you belong in the room, if you're too busy holding the door open for others.

Now let me be clear, insecurity doesn't totally go away. It just changes form as your responsibilities grow and those voices may not disappear; they just shift their focus.

Early in your career, those voices may be asking, do I belong here? And later in your career they might be saying, am I still valuable if I'm not the one leading something? So the response has to evolve too, from proving yourself to expanding others.

I've found that generosity is actually the ultimate unlock.

Insecurity is by definition inward focused. And we can shift the attention by turning our focus outward.

So, in those moments when I'm overthinking something, I realize I can shift the narrative by shifting my actions. I can give feedback, share my insights, mentor someone, pull someone else up, help someone else get unstuck.

You know the old saying that the best way to learn something is to teach it.

Over the course of my career, I've come to realize the best way to understand your own value is to give it away.

As your career progresses, your value is no longer measured by how much you personally execute. It's measured by how much capability you can create in others.

I've learned that reaching outward is the best way to get beyond that internal noise.

Investing in others is the key to magnifying your influence far beyond what you could do on your own. And I think I really started to see that when I stepped back and saw Sam thriving with all things capital formation.

His thriving is not only good for him professionally and personally. It's good for our capital partners, it's good for the firm, and it's given me opportunities to experience growth in other areas of the firm as well.

So just know that no matter where you are in your career journey, we all have moments of questioning and self-doubt.

And when that internal monologue starts swirling, we can stop looking in the mirror.

We can look at our team. We can look beyond our team. Find someone to give back to, no matter what level you are.

Because the fastest way to get out of your own head is to get into someone else's.

Real leadership starts the moment that you decide that your team’s success is more important than your insecurity.

Thank you.